what am I to do with this information ?

When I was in third year at university, I shared a flat with a friend, and some of his friends. By accident I just discovered that one of my flatmates went on to have a successful career as an artist and writer, losing her husband to a brain tumour.

In our world of complete transparency it is a work of moments to pull up a career history, photos, indeed more information than I know about my closest of friends.

She looks different now, less studenty.

Other moderately famous people have crossed my life, a good friend in the street where I grew up went to Cambridge and published a well regarded first novel, someone else went on to become a famous DJ, another worked at the BBC, two friends are now professors, one a prominent surgeon, another of those flatmates has also published a book.

I am purposely not naming any of these people, although their lives are public, it seems wrong to offer independent comment to their early lives.

The lives of those we have known can feel like a critique of the choices that we have made, at one point you were in pretty much the same place, but from that point they went to one place and you went to somewhere completely different. Did they make better choices than you, were they luckier, were they more talented, more suited to that path than you would have been. Of the people that I have listed above, they were all impressive, decent people. You could not resent their success, there can be no doubt they earned it.

There is a small mean part of anyone that resents the success of others. The fear of the school reunion, you want them all to have done slightly less well than you. We all want to be the down to earth superstar who still hangs out with his old friends, but are less keen on being the marginal hanger on, with the superstar mate.

There are a myriad of ways of looking at things, but ultimately it is for us to decide which story we want to tell, and a good story would be -

I have met some amazing people in my life, and might even have played some small part in their lives. There is a world of opportunity out there, and I have seen people achieve great things.

And ultimately it is for each of us to decide what makes for a good life, the right life for ourselves, and to do our best to live that life, no one can really ask any more of us.